Teacher Notes on Instruction-Writing Exercises

Exercise 9: How to make an irregular joint

Context for this case:

Prerequisites:
  • Scaffolded illustrated instructions (with flaws).
  • Improved version of text and pictures.

Cognitive Apprenticeship Features:
  • Models editing technical art as well as text.
  • Reveals "the magic" behind making useful technical art.

Supporting References:
Relevant CA Content Standards  
Goal:
To show how poorly designed technical art makes instructions less helpful to readers than they could be otherwise (and hence, how poor art, like poor text, calls for review and revision to improve it).
Strategy:
Exercise 9, like Exercise 8, includes technical illustrations along with the text. But like Exercise 2, Exercise 9 shows how poorly planned illustrations leave reader needs unmet, just as does poorly written text. Merely including figures does not guarantee adequate instructions. Both draft text and draft figures need thoughtful, thorough editing (inspired by the instruction-writing guidelines, just as in the text-only cases) to find flaws and develop improved alternatives.
APPROACHES:
While students follow along and edit their copies of the student (flawed but scaffolded) version of Exercise 9, I work from the annotated (revised) version in front of the class. I cover the analysis (with large Post-It notes) and then progressively disclose the problems and proposed solutions as each is discussed. We explicitly compare each unimproved and improved step. Alternatively, you could simply give everyone both versions and then mark up a displayed student version as the class discusses each flawed step and how to improve it. Either way, the point is to show students that what they have already learned and practiced about editing text instructions still applies when technical illustrations are involved: it is their responsibility as writers to make sure that the art as well as the words meets reader needs (as the guidelines suggest). Comparing Exercises 8 and 9 can reinforce this point.
ISSUES:
This exercise offers a second perspective on how (only) visually effective technical art contributes to instruction usability.
(1) These draft instructions have (at least) three problems, each cued by the scaffolding on the student version (and by the overt analysis on the annotated version). The guidelines apply to the draft figures as well as to the text.
(2) Useless art, like irrelevant text, needs to be spotted and removed. A figure that fails to suggest any action, as the first one on the student version, may add nothing to the instructions.
(3) Just as a complex (text) step needs to be subdivided, its diagram often needs to be "divided" too (replaced by several incremental diagrams that each better reveal individual actions). Step 2 here has this problem.
(4) A missing step or missing crucial detail (as in Step 3 here) often calls for supplying a missing diagram as well, as this case shows.

The student version of Exercise 9 is scaffolded but not worked. The annotated version shows one way to address the problems in the student version. (This exercise has been generously adapted for this project by artist Brett S. Clark from an idea on p. 94 of Bill Gray's influential Studio Tips, Van Nostrand Reinhold, New York, 1976.)

Case:
Student version:
(9) How to join two sheets of heavy paper or cardboard
along an irregular curve.

1. Paste down (or rubber cement)
   the first sheet on a board (Fig. 1).----PROBLEM:
                                           SOLUTION:



2. Paste the second sheet partly
   over the first and mark the
   irregular curve on it (Fig. 2).---------PROBLEM:
   Carefully cut along the joint           SOLUTION:
   through both sheets, removing
   the extra pieces of paper that
   result.



3. Reset the sheets along the cut
   (Fig. 3) and you should have a----------PROBLEM:
   perfect joint.                          SOLUTION:
Annotated version:
(9) How to join two sheets of heavy paper or cardboard
along an irregular curve.

1. Paste down (or rubber cement)
   the first sheet on a board (Fig. 1).----PROBLEM: USELESS DIAGRAM,
                                                    like irrelevant text
                                           SOLUTION: omit

2. Paste the second sheet partly
   over the first and mark the
   irregular curve on it (Fig. 2).---------PROBLEM: COMPLEX STEP
   Carefully cut along the joint...        SOLUTION: subdivide by action,
                                                     add substep diagrams--
      (a) Paste two sheets partly overlapping (Fig. A).


      (b) Draw curve on top sheet (to fit the
          overlap, Fig. B).

      (c) Cut along the curve through both
          sheets (Fig. C).


      (d) Remove extra pieces from above,
          below (Fig. D).



3. Reset the sheets along the cut
   (Fig. 3) and you should have a----------PROBLEM: NEEDED DETAIL MISSING
   perfect joint.                          SOLUTION: add step (d) above
                                                     before this one
Note:
This exercise most closely supports the following 1998 California English-Language Arts content standard(s).
Reading:
Grade 5--"Understand how text features (e.g., format, graphics, sequence...) make information accessible and usable" (p. 28).
Grade 9/10--"Analyze the structure and format of functional workplace documents, including graphics..." (p. 56).
Writing:
Grade 11--"Enhance meaning by employing rhetorical devices, including...the incorporation of visual aids" (p. 69).

Contact: T. R. Girill trgirill@acm.org